It is officially Summer. However, the subjects have been out of school for a few weeks now. Our subjects are very busy in the school year and expect to be the same in the summer. Currently, Lu is practicing for the All State Choir and still doing her Aerial Arts twice a week. Jr and DP have made the gymnastics team at their gym and thus must go practice twice a week for 1.5 hours each day. This is in addition to their normal 1 hour of gymnastics they complete weekly. The issue is that they no longer do anything at the same time. So SuperMom is constantly driving them around town. Some times this becomes troublesome, and she stated that she is like an Uber driver. I told her that is good, because it means that she has a car that is approved, a good personality, and a steady stream of clients. She replied that not all of that is true but the kids keep coming back. Since she only transports kids, she stated that she is only a K'uber driver. The qualifications are big car, willing to work for free, must be available at all times, good personality is optional, able to act interested in the passengers's stories, somewhat on time, safe, and only minimal complaining to the subjects. To the physicist, the last one does not apply.
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So some times when you think the subjects understand what you are saying, they really don't. The other day, DP asked what cholesterol was. I began to explain to DP that cholesterol is an alcohol, thus the -ol at the end of the word. I also stated that it causes plaque in the arteries and can be bad for your system. I continued with there are good and bad types of cholesterol and we need to limit our intake of the bad type. He then asked where do we get cholesterol. I named a few foods but the one that stuck in his mine was butter. That was the end of the conversation. However, he was talking to a neighbor about random things and for some reason butter came up. DP proceeded to tell the neighbor that he was an alcoholic because he loved butter and butter contained alcohol. I don't know where to go from there. Oh well, he could be a druggy. At least it isn't the hard stuff. So once again the great DP has said or done somethings that make me wonder if he will make in this world. For new readers, he is the literal one. He understands what you say, not what you mean. It is like computer programming when talking to him. He understands what is written on the lines, not what you meant to write on the lines. I have three examples to prove my point. The first happened Wednesday. It was the last day of school and the kids were to leave their book bags at home. Therefore SuperMom packed their lunch in paper bags and wrote a little note on each one.The first was for Jr. His note read. "Jr, Congratulations on Your Last day of School". DP's was similar but said "DP, Congratulations on the Last Day of 2nd Grade". So of course I asked SuperMom, why the two different messages, to which she replied "you know DP". Five minutes later, DP rounds the corner and reads Jr's bag and states "It isn't his last day of school. He is only finishing 1st grade." The second example came last night while watching this show where the main character was a large male who looked like a large female. The character's grandmother dies, and SuperMom in the kitchen only barely watching asks DP if the girl's grandmother died. He replied nope. Then SuperMom asked "who is that older lady who died?". DP replied that "she is the grandmother". SuperMom then asked "was she her Grandmother". Frustrated, DP asked "Who are you talking about?". Equally frustrated, SuperMom replied "her". DP then states "that person is a man and not a her". Finally, the funniest of the three to happen this week deals with his yearbook. While looking at the pictures, SuperMom stated "your teacher takes a good picture". DP replies "she didn't take the pictures; they hired a photographer to take them." Now that is funny, because I was witness to this conversation and before he could utter the words, I knew what his reply would be. I knew that SuperMom had made the mistake of not properly stating what she meant. All this reminds me of Sheldon saying, "there is nothing wrong with me, my mom had me tested." So Jr is the one that is quick to reply to something. Usually it is in a funny manner. One such instance occurred last Sunday night while we were traveling to see a drive in movie about 35 minutes from our house. As soon as we got two miles down the road it started raining. It was about an hour before the movie was to start. As soon as it did start sprinkling however, Jr yells out "Ah come on!". Of course the car load of people laughed at the outburst. But it is not just odd random one liners that get us laughing. He also has some very logical funny opinions. Yesterday, SuperMom instructed him to take his shoes upstairs. After doing so and returning back downstairs a little while later, Jr pipes up he wished we had a live in maid. Now I must notify you that we do have a house cleaning service that comes in once every two weeks and cleans the house. During the time period between that we do the cleaning and the straightening, but mainly the straightening. So SuperMom asked why do you want a live in maid, and Jr replied that way you can stop yelling "I am not your maid" when you tell us to do something. He has many more and once you start laughing he gets it going even more. The best however is when he starts laughing because he has a deep belly laugh that is contagious. |
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April 2018
CategoriesAuthorPracticing medical physicist trying to raise three kids in the south. |